From Brothers to Lovers
by Literate
Summary: He didn't know where it all started. He didn’t know the exact moment in time, the exact date, the exact circumstances in which they loved each other more than society allowed. And he doesn't care. Hitachiincest. Rated M for explicit content.


I got kind of bored with all the suddenness with sex and you know, there has to be _some_ foundation to the twins' twisted relationship. A _lot_ of fics has hints of what happened before they're in their actual relationship, but no one has really written it out. :P I solved that.

Looking back on all my lemon fics, I notice that the twins are very vocal: they talk a lot during sex. :P

Warnings: **Rated M**, for brotherly and not so brotherly affection, kissing, hugging, holding hands, hand-jobs, explicit sex scenes, and lots of other stuff in this wide array of Hitachiincest. Warnings for yaoi and incest, all rolled into one. :P

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran, and yet the Hitachiins rule my writing. -must go find another pairing to write-

* * *

He didn't know where it all started.

Maybe it was their sleeping habits.

They had always slept in the same room, same bed, under the same silky sheets; the only thing that separated them were three inches of breathing space. They never _touched_ as they did now; there was only a reassuring hand in the other's, a warm hand that was connected to their other half. But despite that small touch, they faced each other, a mirror the last thing they see before they closed their large hazel eyes.

Hikaru knew it was because when they were very, _very_ small, they had believed that it was good luck to face a reflection when sleeping, screw all fung shui and what not.

Kaoru knew it was because then he knew that Hikaru was there when he went to sleep and when he woke up, and it was the same for Hikaru too.

They knew they stopped that weird habit when they were seven. They didn't remember the day _it_ began though.

They were probably eleven.

"Hikaru?" Kaoru had whispered, his voice quiet, _shaking_. There was no response on the other side of the bed.

The door creaked slowly. His eyes darted towards the large door, and suddenly he felt small in the huge room. That had never happened before; Hikaru was always there to fit into the rest of the space.

Paranoid, he sat up slightly, his hazel eyes going wide, tone almost hysterical, "Hikaru…"

Behind the door, lights flickered on. Footsteps padded against the carpet outside.

He backed away from the door.

"Hikaru-"

Light flashed from behind him. His heart stopped.

"…Muh?"

"HIKARU, SOMEONE'S OUT TO GET ME!"

He latched himself to the confused twin besides him.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru mumbled, half-asleep, half-confused to as why Kaoru would wake him up late at night and strangle him with an iron-grip.

The younger twin didn't stop and he rattled on in a semi-insane tone, "He's going to get me! He's going to stab a knife into my heart and then chop me up into little pieces and feed it to the fishes and then I won't exist any more!"

"… _Why?_"

"Because he _is_!"

Disgruntled, Hikaru simply hugged his twin back and then let go, not bothering to completely digest the fact that they just saw a movie involving said murderer. He flopped tiredly back onto his side of the bed, his eyes running along Kaoru's figure, before closing to sleep.

Kaoru was appeased… for now. He let his eyes close, snuggling his head into the downy pillow, knowing that Hikaru was just right next to him and since murderers only killed people when they're alone, that was okay. He drifted to sleep easily, his breathing peaceful.

That… wasn't the same for Hikaru.

Because for Hikaru… said murderer had his knife placed precisely at Kaoru's throat.

He almost bolted out of bed.

"Don't kill him!" he almost screeched.

"Stay there or he'd-" the shadowed figure made a motion with his hand and his throat that was obvious to what he was meaning.

Hikaru's breath caught.

The silhouette laughed a cold hard laugh, something like _"Bwahahaha!"_ and pressed his knife against his brother's throat.

Hikaru was wide awake now, as he watched his brother _get chopped into tiny little pieces, his parts being strewn all over the room, blood spilling-_

"KAORU!"

"What, Hikaru, what?" Kaoru was up in an instant.

Hikaru blinked as he saw his twin right next to him, blinking innocently.

"Kaoru! You're not chopped into little tiny pieces and fed to the fishes!" He grabbed his twin, rubbing his tear-streaked face (not like he'd _admit it_ or anything) into Kaoru's _definitely not _bleeding shoulder.

The younger twin raised a brow, processing Hikaru's strange sentence into his head, "… Huh?"

After several content minutes of making sure his twin was alive _and this was not a stupid trick_, Hikaru choked in his tears and pulled away quickly, his fisted hand rubbing the tears away. Pulling his act together, he glared at Kaoru, who looked at his flushed face as obliviously as someone who had no idea what the hell was going on.

… And Kaoru was this kind of person, with no idea why in the seven hells his twin was giving him a death glare.

"Don't you _ever _convince me that someone's after you! Ever again!" he glowered with as much confidence and hatred as he could muster after sobbing for a couple of minutes.

Kaoru was unperturbed.

"Hikaru, I was really scared," he admitted quietly, his eyes downcast. He felt several tears threatening his eyes.

Hikaru shut up quickly, his glare softening as he saw a tear fall down Kaoru's eye.

"And it's not my fault you believed it…" he continued, his watery eyes reflecting another moist pair.

Hikaru frowned, still a little ticked off that he actually _cried_, but since Kaoru was crying too, he wrapped his arms around his twin, almost comfortingly. One of his own tears fell down his cheek.

"You scared me, Kaoru," Hikaru whispered, slightly embarrassed to admit that a nightmare was that bad.

"… You too," Kaoru returned the hug, rubbing his face into his twin's shoulder, his fingers gripping at Hikaru's back.

Several minutes passed as both twins began to recover from the nightmare/paranoia.

"… Kaoru?"

He blinked, feeling Hikaru's breath on his ear, "Yeah?"

Hikaru closed his eyes, stating confidently, "I'm better now."

Kaoru smiled, "Me too."

Some more minutes passed.

"… Hikaru, are you going to let me go any time soon?"

"No."

* * *

Or was it their eating habits?

At first they were content just eating the same foods on two separate plates, synchronizing their movements to their twin. Their foods, forks, and plates never came into contact like _now_; there was only the small hands under the table, touching, as if to say that they were about to aim their chopsticks at the nearest maid, and _not_ abruptly stopping to lick something off of the other's face.

Hikaru knew it was just for fun that they had bad table manners. It was kind of cute to lick a crumb off of Kaoru's face and see the maids' reactions when they least expected it.

Kaoru knew it was the maids that thought that two five-year-olds showing affection to each other was cute, that it was the maids who told them to stop and _grow up_.

And the thing was, they _did_ stop and grow up. They just didn't know when it started again.

Maybe when they were twelve.

Hikaru stared at his brother's untouched food, moving his eyes to said brother. Kaoru sniffed long and hard, and rubbed at his nose, angrily.

"Kaoru?" the elder twin watched as his twin try to take another tissue from the empty tissue box. He crossed his eyes, and pushed himself from the chair. Hikaru blinked, "Kaoru?"

Kaoru sneezed again, and grappled with a handkerchief he suddenly brought out of nowhere. Hikaru popped up surprisingly behind him.

"Kaoru, are you sick?"

It went without saying. Kaoru continued to blow his nose.

"You didn't eat anything," Hikaru pointed out uselessly.

Kaoru simply sniffed, before replying weakly, "I don't feel hungry."

Hikaru's lips thinned into a frown, as he wrapped his arms around his sick twin, his eyes fixed slyly on Kaoru's face.

"Should oniichan make you feel better?" he cooed. Kaoru crossed his eyes, brushing off his twin.

"They say," Hikaru started, curiously, before smiling playfully at his twin, "They say, if you kiss someone, that someone would feel better, ne?"

Kaoru deadpanned his almost hopeful expression.

"That's idiotic," he scoffed, turning his eyes towards Hikaru's, quirking a brow, "Besides, why would you want to kiss me?"

Hikaru smirked, "To make you feel better."

Without another thought, Hikaru pulled his twin closer, laying his lips onto Kaoru's. He felt his twin stiffen under him, arms trying to push Hikaru away. The elder twin simply deepened the kiss, prying Kaoru's lips open, running his tongue along the insides of Kaoru's mouth.

Around them, maids were stopping to gape at the scene.

After all, it's a great day in their yaoi fantasies to see their two young masters going at it. At twelve years old.

After a good minute, Kaoru finally decided that it was enough and pushed his brother away, his eyes dazed, "Hi-Hikaru."

Hikaru licked his lips, almost seductively, "Yeah?"

"That…" Kaoru managed to get out. He blinked a bit, before looking at Hikaru's successful grin, "That does feel better."

"See, what did I say?"

Hours later.

Kaoru tapped the edge of their bed, sitting with as much sophistication as a preteen could muster. His hazel eyes watched the lump before him, snuggled deeply into his, _their_, bed. He placed his feet onto the bed, the large mattress sinking under the weight.

"What _did_ you say?" Kaoru asked, crawling onto the bed, poking at the lump that was his twin.

Hikaru groaned, pulling away from Kaoru's poking, "My head hurts. Go away."

Kaoru smiled slightly, running a hand through his brother's sweat-soaked hair, "Did you learn your lesson?"

"Of kissing a sick person, yes," Hikaru shuddered, pulling his sheets over his head.

"Well, now you're sick," Kaoru mused out loud. Hikaru moaned louder, "And you didn't eat." He watched with amusement as Hikaru slam his head against the pillow.

"I don't want to eat, Kaoru," Hikaru mumbled, not looking at his twin, "Not hungry."

Kaoru stared at the tray of food at his side, a worried expression etched on his face, "You sure?"

Hikaru grunted onto his pillow, before slamming his head into the downy pillow.

Kaoru sighed, his eyes sliding closed, not really knowing what to do and how to make Hikaru… feel better…

He snapped his eyes open, a small smile edging onto his lips.

Hikaru lay on the bed, blissfully ignorant to the plan that was being formulated in Kaoru's mind. He was having a raging headache right now; any and all medicines would _not_ work on this blasted headache.

_Why_ did he have to _kiss _his brother while he was _sick?_

"Hikaru, are you okay?"

Of course, he wasn't! He's _sick_.

"I'll take that as a no," he finished to an annoyed grunt of _do whatever_, flipping his irritated twin over onto his back. Taking him completely by surprise, he pressed his lips against an identical pair. He felt Hikaru gasp, and pressed further, his tongue entering his mouth curiously. He pushed Hikaru against the bed, his eyes closed as the small piece of sashimi made landing into Hikaru's mouth, forcing it down his throat.

The elder Hitachiin screwed his eyes in disgust and quickly shoved his brother away from him.

"What the hell was that?" he spluttered, staring up his brother in disbelief. The younger twin just smiled, before lying down next to his now-kinda-well brother. "That was mashed up raw fish!"

Kaoru leaned against Hikaru, his hazel eyes looking distantly at the ceiling, "Do you feel better Hikaru?"

Hikaru frowned slightly, scratching his head, admitting stubbornly, "I… guess. But… Well, fine."

There was some silence between the two of them, as Kaoru closed his eyes, Hikaru wrapping his arms protectively around him. He ran a hand through his brother's hair, before leaning down and whispering, softly, just so the two of them could hear.

"Can we do it again?"

* * *

Perhaps it was in the showers?

They had done it since they were little: they shared baths daily, enjoyed bubbles together, and helped each other to scrub and to shower off the annoying suds of soap. They never touched like _now_; it was just the brotherly care, innocent slips, and genuine affection. It never mattered: they were completely identical in every physical aspect, so why bother to even acknowledge it?

Hikaru knew it was because it was fun for him to play with his equally-as-naked brother, soap, bubbles, bathing equipment included.

Kaoru knew it was because he and Hikaru had the exact same body _anyway_, so touching him was just like touching _himself_; and there was no difference whatsoever.

They knew they didn't stop doing it every night. But they didn't know when it changed.

They might've been thirteen.

"What happened last night?" Kaoru hummed, beginning to unbutton his pale yellow shirt. He eyed his brother, who was sitting on the sink counter, swinging his legs dejectedly. He tossed his shirt to the side, raising a brow when he noticed Hikaru didn't do a thing, "Hikaru…?"

"Hmm?" the elder twin blinked before pulling away from his twin's touch. He closed his eyes, bitterness leaking into his voice, "Nothing, Kaoru. Just go shower."

Kaoru simply dropped his hand, blinking confusedly. That was the first time Hikaru had told him to shower alone.

"Hikaru, are you sure you didn't have a nightmare?" Kaoru poked at him innocently, as Hikaru twitched not so innocently.

"I _told _you, just shower already, Kaoru!" he bit back his exclamation before crossing his arms and turning away from his brother, "You won't get it."

Kaoru blinked, a small tear coming into his eyes, his voice soft, timid, _un-Kaoru-like,_ "…Fine, Hikaru…"

The elder Hitachiin flustered, bringing his legs up onto the marble counter, pulling himself closer, feeling very, _very_ bad that he just _yelled_ at his brother. The curtains slid once and then twice, and the shower was turned on, the raining of water falling against the tiles.

When he was sure that Kaoru was inside the shower cubicle, he flopped his legs over the side of the counter, letting out a long, aggravated sigh, a gloomy cloud hovering above him.

He had a _problem_ the entire afternoon, and he had no idea what the hell to do with it. Kaoru wasn't helping it either; whenever his little brother was close to him, his face would flush red, and his body would heat up. He leaned against the counter tiredly, the back of his head contacting against the mirror.

Adolescence sucked.

Plus, _he_ was the only one who _felt_ that way. He was _right_ in thinking that Kaoru would _never_ understand.

While he sat there dejectedly, mulling over the damned workings of life and puberty, Kaoru popped his head from behind the curtains, water trailing down his body.

"Hikaru, how long are you going to stay there?"

He flinched, whipping his head towards Kaoru's questioning one.

"Is there a problem?" the younger twin repeated, oblivious to Hikaru's obvious discomfort.

"I think I'm going outside for some air," Hikaru said distractedly, hopping off the counter, walking briskly towards the door. His heart beat rapidly, and just as he reached for the door-

Wet arms encircled him, something heavy and wet placing itself on his shoulder. He froze, widening his hazel eyes.

"Why?" Kaoru's innocent, _ignorant_ voice prodded.

Hikaru couldn't escape now; he gulped nervously, wondering if Kaoru knew what was happening or not. The warm water seeped through his clothes, burning against his skin. And-

Kaoru was entirely naked. Hikaru paled even more.

"Come on," Kaoru murmured into his neck, unaware that his twin was shaking uncontrollably. "What's up?"

_You're turning me on right now and I can't think properly with you breathing down my neck_, Hikaru closed his eyes, wondering if it was even _possible_ to keep something from his nosy twin.

"You don't need help in taking off your clothes, right?" he heard his younger brother mumble, feeling his fingers on his shirt collar. In an instant, he was flipped around and shoved against the door, Kaoru unbuttoning his shirt easily.

"I don't need your help, Kaoru," he pushed his brother away, buttoning up his shirt again, all the while telling himself that this was all Kaoru's unintentional and good-natured attempts and he was _not_ spiting him because of his problem.

"You can't go without showering, Hikaru," Kaoru drawled, his hands stopping Hikaru's.

Dammit, Hikaru cursed mentally.

"Fine," the elder twin sighed, conceding to the younger's request. Kaoru perked up, smiling cheerfully.

Hikaru glanced at him indifferently, as he peeled off his shirt. He slid his pants off cautiously, eying his brother's blissful expression from the corner of his eyes.

"Um, Hikaru, why are you taking so long?"

He wanted to slam his head into the door, seeing it was the closest and hardest thing around him.

"No reason," Hikaru mumbled, kicking his pants off.

Kaoru observed blankly, commenting bluntly, "But you usually just like flinging your clothes everywhere."

"I…" he bit his lip: no, he _shouldn't_ tell his brother; Kaoru won't understand. He crossed his arms, pacing towards the running shower, admitting quietly, "I don't feel too well."

"Oh," he heard Kaoru mumble, "Okay, then let's shower quickly and then we can go straight to sleep!"

Hikaru's eyes darted to the clock (blasted six thirty), as his stomach dropped, "Actually, I'm pretty fine, Kaoru, I just-"

"Why do you still have your boxers on, Hikaru?" Kaoru poked at his elder brother, blinking innocently, as Hikaru slipped off his boxers, shuffling into the shower quickly. The younger Hitachiin poked his head through the parted curtains, "And why are you running away from me?"

"Kaoru…" Hikaru's brow twitched, trying to find a good way to explain to his ignorant brother the idiocy of _adolescence,_ "I… can't talk to you about this…"

The warm spray hit against his skin, as he heard a small, hesitant step against the water-covered ground.

"Hikaru…" and Hikaru gulped nervously as he felt his twin sidle up to him, almost timidly, "Why _can't_ you talk to me? I'm your twin; I've been with you for life."

Hikaru smiled sheepishly, "That's… not really the case here."

He felt Kaoru's cold hand on his shoulder, as another hand went to close the showerhead, "Then what is it?"

"It's… a problem," he said bluntly, reading the confused expression Kaoru had on his face, "A guy problem." Kaoru simply blinked again. "_You know_, _that_ guy problem."

"I don't remember you crushing on anyone, Hikaru."

Hikaru slammed his head against the tiled walls, almost completely giving up on his brother.

"I meant, the _other_ guy problem."

Kaoru simply stared at him for a while, as Hikaru resumed smashing his head against the wall.

"Wait, Hikaru, there was something _different_ about you," Kaoru commented nonchalantly, turning his twin around slowly; Hikaru stopped, blinking emptily at his brother. "Ah, there," he waved casually at his twin's pulsing erection, blinking, and then widening his eyes-

"Wait a second, how the hell did you get that?!"

"_That's_ the problem I was talking about!" Hikaru retorted, shaking his twin roughly, his eyes crossing in annoyance, "Sheesh," he scoffed, letting go of his half-dazed twin to step out of the shower, the curtains sliding closed behind him. He reached for a towel, a hand stopping him-

"Do you need help with it then?"

Hikaru flushed crimson in embarrassment, "What? I mean- no! I can handle it myself!"

"If you can handle it yourself, then you wouldn't be stomping out of the shower without taking a complete bath," Kaoru piped up casually, pulling his twin back into the shower, "Here, sit," he commanded sternly, forcing his twin onto the cold tile floor, as Hikaru mumbled a few choice words, bringing his legs towards himself.

"And just because I have no idea what you're talking about, doesn't mean I won't ignore you, Hikaru," he said, squirting some shampoo onto his hands. The elder twin crossed his arms in front of him, as Kaoru began scratching at his scalp, massaging the vanilla shampoo into Hikaru's hair.

"Kaoru," Hikaru sniffed at the air, before asking testily, "Why are you using _vanilla?_"

"Smells nice," Kaoru said casually, "Plus there's nothing else in here."

"Oh, okay," Hikaru mumbled defeated, sinking his head into his knees, before admitting quietly, "It does smell kind of nice."

Kaoru smiled slyly, "Good, then."

Hikaru blinked, about to turn his head to his twin, wondering, when Kaoru slipped a hand in front of him, grasping at Hikaru's curved shaft, fingering it curiously. His eyes widened.

"Kao-Kaoru, what the hell are you-"

"Hey, I said I'll help you," Kaoru said, leaning against him, his soapy hand stroked his length. Hikaru bit back a moan, as Kaoru slid his hand slowly, before tightening his grasp on him. Hikaru yelped, entirely ready to shove his twin off of him, when Kaoru brought his other arm around, trapping the struggling Hitachiin.

"Kaoru," he complained rashly, as the younger twin loosened his fingers around him, "That _hurt_."

"Just relax, Hikaru, you're tensing up too much," Kaoru mumbled into his skin, easing his strokes, "I might not know what it feels like, but I know how to get rid of it."

"And how do you know?" Hikaru shot back bitterly.

"Mother and Father weren't too discreet about it."

Hikaru bit back a retort: he did _not_ want to know what their mom and dad did together.

He sighed, relaxing into Kaoru's tight and firm embrace, as Kaoru continued to pump his member, his slender fingers raking against his skin.

"… Where did you learn to do this, Kaoru?"

Kaoru quirked a brow, "I didn't, Hikaru. I just know."

"Ah. Okay." Hikaru let out a content sigh, moaning loudly as he released himself onto the shower floor, falling back into Kaoru's one-handed hug. His twin pulled his hand away, examining the soap-semen mix on his hand curiously.

"Think I can do that yet, Hikaru?" Kaoru purred quietly, hugging his twin fondly, waving his hand in front of his brother.

"Nope," Hikaru said, smiling slightly, "Not yet."

* * *

No, it was _definitely _their holding hands.

They didn't remember a time when they were not touching. Whenever they stood together, a stray (or not so stray) brush, a gentle (or not so gentle) touch, a subtle (or not so subtle) tap, or a persistent contact would always be there. Only when they really needed each other they entwined their fingers together. It was never as forceful, never as forbidden as it was_ now_.

Hikaru knew it was because he just needed to know that Kaoru was still like him, still thinking the same thing, still experiencing the same sensations.

Kaoru knew it was because he just needed Hikaru to know that everything was still alright, that nothing was going to change between them, now and forever.

And the thing was: they _knew_ when their excessive brotherly love slipped into actual love.

It was the Host Club.

And it was when they were fourteen.

"Kaoru, do you want to continue the host club?"

Kaoru blinked, looking up from his fashion magazine, running his eyes over his slightly disgruntled twin as he closed the door to the bathroom.

"Do you, Hikaru?" The elder twin trotted quietly over to his brother, sitting quietly onto the side of the bed.

"Not really," Hikaru admitted, as he sighed, an annoyed look on his face, "It's kind of annoying."

Kaoru quirked a brow, "The symmetrical brotherly love act, you mean?"

He nodded, moving his legs onto the bed. He cleared his throat before looking weakly at his twin, "I can't take it anymore."

"The act?" Hikaru nodded again. "The act where you're such a good seme that it turns both of us on-"

"_Yes_, _that_ act."

There was a long silence, as the two stared at each other.

"… Kaoru, you get turned on too?"

He gives him a face, "Duh, what with your annoying advances, who _wouldn't_?"

Hikaru grunted simply in agreement, before pausing, and glancing at him skeptically, "But I didn't see you take care of it yet."

At this, Kaoru let out a groan, before giving Hikaru a stink eye, "No, I keep getting _interrupted_," he sat up, crossing his arms, and somehow, Hikaru could see the bulge in his pants. Kaoru let out an annoyed sigh, slapping the magazine against the bed covers, "Look, the girls wouldn't let me leave the table after your heated confessions. And Hani-senpai walked in on me in the bathroom after host club, so I had to get home to do it. But then, you lock yourself inside the bathroom for an hour _straight_, while leaving me out here doing _nothing_," Kaoru huffed, "So _no_, I _didn't_ take care of it."

Hikaru blinked, his eyes glued to his twin's pants, "So… you didn't take care of it…right?"

"Nope!" Kaoru chirped, completely oblivious to as why Hikaru was staring. Blinking, he cocked his head slightly, slightly confused, "Why are you asking me that?"

Hikaru perked up slightly, a slight shine to his mischievous hazel eyes. His hand traveled to Kaoru's, his fingers curling around identical ones.

"Just listening to you rant with a hard on is kind of arousing, Kaoru," he said quietly, his other hand traveling to Kaoru's chin, before pushing his brother back against the bed. His voice turned playful, "Do that more often."

Kaoru blinked, his hand tightening around Hikaru's, "But weren't you just in the bathroom minutes ago?"

He licked his lips, lowering his head to his twin's shoulder, whispering quietly, "Yup, but it was kind of hard to get rid of it this time around."

"What-? Why?" he shuddered slightly, feeling Hikaru's hot breath on his ear. The elder twin nipped softly at the piece of skin, placing short kisses along his neck. Kaoru's mind blanked for a second before pushing his twin away, "Hikaru, you didn't answer my question."

Hikaru hummed, "You were pounding on the doors; couldn't concentrate."

"You need to concentrate?" Kaoru mumbled airily as Hikaru continued his ministrations on his neck, occasionally pressing his lips onto the soft skin underneath his fingers.

"Of course, always," he mumbled into his skin, closing his eyes, as his free hand massaged against Kaoru's chest, eliciting a muffled moan. Kaoru's eyes hazed over, as he tried to fight for sanity, his breaths shortening.

"Wait, Hikaru," he said dazedly, trying to ignore the sensations that are coursing through his body, "What are you doing?"

"What I wanted to do for a long time," Hikaru purred, rubbing against Kaoru's neck. Releasing his hand for a short moment, he unbuttoned his brother's pale yellow uniform, his cold hands sliding down his brother's chest, tickling his sensitive skin, his expert fingers pressing, twisting. Kaoru let out an involuntary moan, as he pressed his hands against Hikaru's clothed chest.

"When did you ever want to do this?" he asked curiously, wondering if he even meant whatever he said because he _really, really_ liked what Hikaru was doing to him.

Hikaru paused, before lowering his face to his, pressing his lips to an identical pair. Just seconds later, and somehow, Kaoru felt like he wanted it to continue-

_But this was Hikaru_.

_You know_, the little voice taunted, _your brother._

Kaoru looked breathlessly at him, before his mental instincts almost took over and almost shoved Hikaru completely off of him. Instead, the elder twin pinned him against the bed, winded, aroused,_ knowingly,_ his hand inching to his hand, entwining together, a sly smile widening on his lips.

"Since two seconds ago," and Hikaru went back to attacking his mouth, his tongue battling with the other, his hand involuntarily squeezing Kaoru's in comfort.

Kaoru shivered slightly, pulling away, his head against the mattress, "Hikaru, are you sure you're not drunk or anything?"

"Come on, Kaoru," Hikaru drawled, his breath spray into Kaoru's flushed face; his eyes were hardened with lust, "This is practically common sense. You're turned on, I'm turned on. Please?"

"It's…" Kaoru fumbled slightly as Hikaru unbuttoned his shirt, flinging it off to the side, "It's… It's kind of weird."

Hikaru stopped, looking up at his twin, his hand reaching to Kaoru's, raising it to his cheek, "Don't worry about it, Kaoru. I'll handle it."

The younger twin frowned, trying to escape from his brother's grasp, but Hikaru had his hands in custody, and he couldn't move with Hikaru on top of him. He sighed, his face reddening as Hikaru leaned down, flickering his tongue out at his nipples, scratching his teeth against his flushed skin.

He was probably never going to admit it but Hikaru was _too damn arousing_ at times.

"Mmm," Hikaru hummed, one of his hands still clasping Kaoru's, the other shooting down, tugging at Kaoru's pants impatiently. Once his hand was on the zipper he pulled down, Kaoru's eyes widening at the sound.

"W-What the hell- Hikaru!" he strained to stop his brother, but being pinned down with one hand, it soon escalated to a one-handed battle, with Kaoru flailing in vain.

Hikaru stuck his tongue out in concentration, his hand making quick work of his pants, while Kaoru attempted to scratch at him. In an instant, his pants were pulled down, and soon after his boxers followed, Kaoru's face coloring as he struggled against his brother more, fumbling one handedly.

"Hikaru, I never agreed to this!" he yelled out, trying to snap his brother out of his sinful daze.

They always were equal, always the same, _had always been,_ but for some reason Kaoru couldn't kick his brother off of him.

Maybe it was because Hikaru was making him feel embarrassed and weak and disoriented and-

Maybe it was because Hikaru's hand was in his, and that was enough to make the difference.

Hikaru glanced at his brother's erection, his eyes half-lidded, his breath cascading onto the sensitive skin, leaving Kaoru to fear for the worse as he bit back whatever sound he was about to make.

"Can I convince you then, Kaoru?"

And even in this state, Hikaru could still make coherent sentences.

"No, you can't; you're my brother and we're not going to do anything like-" Kaoru's breath stopped, before letting out a long moan, loud, hair-raising, _arousing_. Hikaru smirked successfully to himself, as his younger brother let out a breathy gasp, "Dammit, Hikaru, you're-"

The next words were mumbles that Hikaru decided he didn't want to hear, that he should better concentrate on the task at hand and arouse Kaoru even more. He adjusted his hand at the base of the member, slowly sliding upwards as his mouth sucked at the hardness, swirling his tongue along the head, playing with his brother's arousal.

He felt a hand press against his hand, fingers curling into his hair, and he blinked, stopping, to see a breathless twin, half-glaring, half-staring at him.

"Kaoru…" he raised his head from his brother, meeting his twin's glazed eyes awkwardly, "Are you okay, Kaoru?"

"Hikaru," Kaoru snapped, his eyes sliding closed before opening half-way, "Why the hell did you stop?"

Hikaru smiled slightly, _knowing _that Kaoru wasn't going to protest anymore. He leaned up against his brother, pressing his lips against an identical pair, something deep in his mind reminding him that this _was his brother he's doing this to_- but he simply pushed it away, raising his entire body against Kaoru, sliding his body against his twin's, hearing as Kaoru moaned into his kiss.

"Mmm," he pulled away slightly, "Then, you'll let me do this?"

"Do what?" Kaoru asked, his mind blank from the mind-blowing _things_ Hikaru just did.

"Can we?" he murmured, licking at Kaoru's cheek, his hand pressing another hand against the soft mattress. He moved to look at Kaoru's confused eyes, "Do this? Please?"

There was a momentary silence. Hikaru looked deeply into his eyes, almost begging, as Kaoru simply stared blankly, before he blushed a dark crimson, averting his eyes suddenly-

"Y-You mean, _that?_" Kaoru fumbled slightly, as Hikaru placed his mouth over his again, muffling his nervous response with his tongue. His free hand traversed his twin's body, as he settled comfortably between Kaoru's legs, his finger poking at the hidden entrance. The younger twin was flushed against his brother's body, anxiety mixing into his slight pleasure, "Hi-Hikaru... I-"

"If anything goes wrong and I hurt you," he heard his brother's strangely casual voice, "I'll stop, okay?"

Kaoru nodded, his unsure eyes searching for his twin's.

There was another long, awkward silence, as Kaoru shivered slightly, wondering what Hikaru was doing above him. A wet finger brushed against his entrance timidly, before forcing itself into the thick flesh. The elder twin spread his brother's legs further apart, trying to get a good position as he thrust the finger deeper inside.

Kaoru, on the other hand, bit his lip; the feeling of something up _there_ was very _odd_ and slightly _painful_, and he wriggled, hoping that maybe he would adjust to that sensation soon enough.

A second finger slid in, a cool liquid lubing the otherwise harsh entrance. Taken off guard, Kaoru yelped, small beads of tears falling from his eyes, as he struggled again, feeling that maybe, maybe, _maybe_, this had got to stop _now_.

"Kaoru?" came Hikaru's uncertain voice, his fingers pausing. He felt Hikaru's hand tighten around his, as he squeezed shakily in response, an _I'm fine_ mixed with _I'm not sure we're supposed to be doing this, still_.

Hikaru brought their entwined hands up to his face, placing Kaoru's cold, shivering hand against his cheek, "It'll get better, promise, Kaoru." He felt a faint squeeze in return, followed by his brother's shaky voice-

"It- It hurts, Hikaru. I'm not even sure that we're supposed to be doing this at this age-"

He nodded in response, and still clenching Kaoru's hand, the fingers resumed stretching, scissoring the hole open, feeling as Kaoru shook underneath him. He kissed Kaoru's open lips, slipping his tongue inside, massaging, distracting. He pushed in a third finger, feeling first-hand his brother's stiffening body, feeling slightly guilty that he was even _hurting_ his brother. Soon, he could feel Kaoru loosening up, unclenching his entire body, letting out a semi-contented sigh.

Hikaru simply blinked, pulling away to see the airy expression on his brother's face.

"Are you ready, Kaoru?"

"Mmm."

"… What's that supposed to mean, Kao-"

"Just- Just hurry up, Hikaru," Kaoru growled, a blush splashed on his face. He squirmed, trying to get a better position as Hikaru removed his fingers from him, sliding his pants off, boxers following, positioning himself at his entrance. And it was _not_ the time to suddenly become shy of his own body.

"…You sure?"

Kaoru let out an annoyed groan, giving Hikaru a half-heart glare, "If you don't do it right now, I'm going to hate you for unnecessarily turning me on after I already had problems-"

Hikaru simply smiled, their hands tightening together, as he pushed himself into the warmth of Kaoru's body, burying himself to the hilt with the incredible, burning heat. He placed his head onto Kaoru's shoulder, waiting quietly as his twin shook, trying to adjust to the even _stranger_ and even _more painful_ sensations.

Kaoru fidgeted slightly, his breath shortening abruptly, as Hikaru moved a bit deeper into him. His eyes were tearing from the pain in his lower body, as he struggled to calm himself, his hand sweaty in Hikaru's grasp. It hurt _more_ than the three fingers inside him; the organ was pulsing within him, stretching him to house his own brother.

It was… kind of weird, Kaoru concluded, and shifted slightly- but it was kind of nice- his hand tightening around Hikaru's pale fingers. The elder took this as a signal, propping himself above Kaoru, beginning to pull out, the younger letting out a small pained breath.

Conscious of his twin's pain, Hikaru gripped Kaoru's hand unsurely, thinking to pull out and simply-

"Move, Hikaru," Kaoru complained quietly, moving their hands to his chest, looking up to his hesitant older brother.

"Maybe, we should do this when we're older," Hikaru murmured quietly, agreeing to Kaoru's previous statement, the weight of _hurting his brother_ on his mind. As he attempted to pull entirely out, Kaoru's legs tightened around his waist, stopping him roughly; Kaoru bit back a pained cry, as Hikaru blinked, looking up to meet his twin's hazel eyes, searching, wondering _why_, "Kaoru?"

"Just do it, Hikaru," Kaoru gritted his teeth, closing his eyes, trying and failing to ignore Hikaru's presence within him. His breath shuddered as he looked up hopefully at his twin, smiling weakly, "It'll get better soon… won't it?"

Hikaru nodded, smiling slightly back, a little confidence trickling back into him, as he rolled his hips into Kaoru's, hearing a small gasp, and he set a slow rhythm, cautious, hesitant, _scared_.

Suddenly, Kaoru gripped his hand tightly, as he whispered inaudibly. The elder twin blinked, as panic climbed up his throat-

"Kaoru? Is something the matter? Did I hurt you?" Hikaru rambled, stopping completely, as he searched for his twin's misty expression.

"Faster…" Kaoru whispered again, the heated erection stroking his insides, his face flushed with pleasure. Hikaru's eyes fluttered, confused, as his younger brother wrapped his legs even tighter around him, "P-Please, faster…"

"Ah, okay," he mumbled, continuing his thrusts almost nervously.

Kaoru accented the room with moans, provoking his brother even more, their movements becoming more erratic, faster. Drops of sweat rolled down Hikaru's face, as he lost himself into this- this _act_ that was the end, the _all the way_ – feeling each other in a way they've never felt before, until their lovemaking sent them into mindless pleasure, not knowing what was where, and what was happening-

But their hands were still entwined, still together, and still there- Hikaru's fingers slid into Kaoru's naturally, assuring each other that they were still there, still thinking alike, still knowing the same things, same sensations-

Hikaru reached his climax, a wave of pleasure washing over him as he released into his brother, as Kaoru's semen spilled all over the bed, over each other. Hikaru collapsed, falling onto his brother, the heat and passion subsiding, and he wrapped his arm around his twin contently, the other fingering his brother's hand.

He hummed softly, peacefully, as he rested his head in the crook of Kaoru's neck.

"That… was very nice, Kaoru."

"Mmm," Kaoru agreed sleepily, curling his fingers into Hikaru's, as he nestled into his twin's arms.

"We should do that again," Hikaru mumbled, sliding his eyes closed.

"Someday."

"Yeah."

The curtains swayed ominously, still in the quiet air of the bedroom.

"Hikaru? "

"Hmm?"

"Get out of me. Now."

Hikaru blinked once, before smiling into Kaoru's skin.

"No fair, I like it."

* * *

He didn't know where it all started.

Maybe it's when they were fifteen.

When lust and sex and attraction take on a whole new meaning and every night and every day holds a different array of possibilities, of positions.

All he knows is that Hikaru's above him and he below him, that passion and friction sliding between their bodies, that soft skin burning identically soft skin, that chilling heat crawling up his spine, that pain flowering from his lower body, and he doesn't care about how this entire twisted relationship came to be because it just _did_.

"Mmm, Hikaru," the words, the name just slide off his lips as he wrapped his arms around Hikaru's shoulders, mumbling the rest of the heat-hazed words into the crook of his neck. He adjusts his position subtly and as if on cue, his brother moans because now, the narrow passage is even more constricted and Kaoru _knows_ how much Hikaru loves that feeling.

Hikaru's hands are positioned at the side of Kaoru's body, his palms pressing against the soft, fluffy mattress under his fingers. His breathless moans are turning into sharp grunts as he tries to readjust his position, and he can't _do anything_ with his brother blocking the way, literally, "_Frick_, Kaoru, you think I can do something with this?"

A hand lifts from the sheets and pushes Kaoru's legs farther open. His hazel eyes widen slightly, letting out a small squeak, as he struggles to regain a better, _less vulnerable_ position, in which Hikaru isn't practically ripping him apart.

But, it's always wasted effort; Hikaru does what he wants to do—and yes, sometimes, his decisions and choices aren't that great, Kaoru's got to admit. But then, that's why rational, mature Kaoru is there to prevent bloodshed.

Kaoru stops it, tightening his legs around Hikaru's waist, pushing him all the way into the hilt, and _keeping_ him there. His breath shudders as he feels Hikaru's harsh pulse inside him, a _disgustingly odd_ turn on, and with each beat, he doesn't want to let go. And Kaoru, for some odd reason unbeknownst to himself and Hikaru, likes it like this. Maybe because— in the tiny struggle against him, Hikaru blows at his brother's happy and pained face, his slightly turned-off expression vocalizing his discontent— Hikaru doesn't like it.

"Kaoru," he drawls lazily, letting Kaoru run his hand through his sweaty brown hair as endearingly as he could possibly want, "Can't I just continue? Does it matter that I'm going too fast?"

The younger gives him a slightly exhausted look, "Yeah, I mean-" he let out a sigh as he loosen his legs, leaning against the soft downy pillow, "-twice in the same day, just as-"

"What do you mean, _twice_, Kaoru?"

Kaoru makes some sort of sound between a displeased snort and a confident nod, as Hikaru resumed his flesh-chaffing, possible blood-spilling lovemaking. Hikaru's never been the soft type.

"I…" Kaoru takes a deep breath, trying to concentrate his thoughts when it feels like he's already sharing them with his brother. His hazel eyes flutters closed, as he whispers, almost _entranced_ by Hikaru's rhythm, "This... last night… and this morning…"

Hikaru catches on quickly, "And you'd- _we'd_- be exhausted by tonight."

Kaoru nods weakly, not bothering to even pay attention to his twin, now that Hikaru's settled for something slower, less rough. He can vaguely feel the soft fabric around him, the heat, sweat rising from both of their bodies; the thought that Hikaru is doing this _again_ and the fact that Hikaru _is_ doing it again create a small spark of electricity lighting through his dim and tired mind and his sensitive nerves. He can't feel anymore- _numbed _to the point he doesn't _care_- and all he can feel is Hikaru's movements, Hikaru's breathes, Hikaru's words-

"I'll let you top tonight then."

Kaoru simply waves him away, wordlessly.

"You don't want?"

He shook his head, content to only being half-asleep as Hikaru sought to complete their separate halves again.

Because, after all, they had done this since the beginning of time (or a time related to it), so why, when he's all exhausted, do it continuously every single waking moment of his life?

No, he doesn't want to top someone who'd want to do it more than he did.

"Alright, Kaoru; be that way."

And that's what Kaoru intended to do.

He didn't know where it all started.

He didn't know the exact moment in time, didn't know the exact date, didn't know the exact circumstances in which they loved each other more than society allowed.

All he knows is that Hikaru was Hikaru and Kaoru was Kaoru, that they are one person and have always been one person, and that they're two halves seeking each other, completing each other, alone, together, never, forever.

And he doesn't care when everything else goes flying out the window because of the _we_, because of Hikaru, Kaoru, and their confusingly twisted brotherly and not-so-brotherly relationship.

All he can feel is Hikaru, in and out of him.

And all he knows is that Hikaru is doing a damn good job and he doesn't want it to stop.


End file.
